Sick of the Scarlet "C"

I am tired of having 'sort of' cancer. Really tired.

You see, DCIS is cancer but I had no lump, no lumpectomy - which I am grateful for. But you are still in the 'cancer'category which makes you feel all sick and diseased. Even when you feel fine. In my case, they got the cluster out during the biopsy and my radiation is being performed as a preventative measure. Again grateful. But feeling labeled. Now I know what others must feel like who don't want the disease to define them, regardless of how serious. It sucks.

The man who goes in for radiation treatment before me is in his 90s. He is always smiling, always positive, always looking forward. I have learned a lot from Bill. He is my angel. He, without knowing, changed my attitude toward this ordeal. I am learning a lot about myself and what real problems are. And who real heros are. I am meeting quite a few.

All in all, I'm feeling great. A litle tired, a little sunburned but those are things that are easy to deal with. I've been able to work, manage the girls, and still run around like a half-crazed lunatic. Which I like.

My parents are leaving to return to Florida on Friday. It's been nice to have them despite a rainy week. Supposed to feel like summer for the weekend. Break out those flip flops New Englanders - yahoo!

Time to make dinner and have a much-needed glass of wine. Want to relax tonight. Who will get kicked off idol? My predictions are Lil and Matt. For whatever it's worth.

19 treatments down and 14 to go. I can already smell my trip to Cancun at the end of next month. Yum!!